I used to think that self-pity was a problem for certain personality types. I didn’t think that I was particularly susceptible. How wrong I was.
I now believe that self-pity is one of our greatest and most subtle enemies. That’s why I’m following up last week’s blog with more on this topic.
We all know to keep a watch out for unforgiveness, pride or fear. However, in my view, self-pity is like a stealth missile – often invisible yet very dangerous.
Let me recap last week’s core verse: “Without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.” (Hebrews 11:6)
This means that our prayers of petition must but be full of faith. We need to come to God expecting a rich reward. That is the posture for answered prayers. But I can’t be full of faith and full of self-pity at the same time. In fact, even a drop of self-pity greatly dilutes faith.
The problem is that the enemy is always whispering reasons in our ears why we should feel sorry for ourselves: “It’s not fair, no-one really understands me, this is too much, my lot is too hard” and so on.
The Lord showed me that self-pity is a dampener and a door opener. What do I mean? Well, imagine you have been believing God for your physical healing. Your heart is full of faith.
Then you hear a whisper saying, “Everyone else gets their miracles instantly. It’s not fair. You’ve been waiting for far too long.” Self pity creeps in, dampens your spirits and pushes faith out.
But undermining your faith is not enough for self-pity. He opens the door to other negative attitudes too. The first is offence. Self-pity often blames others.
Maybe you’ve been through a really tough time. Self pity will start to tell you that no-one bothered to call. It will whisper that leaders were insensitive and friends didn’t care. Soon you’re feeling offended, often with the very people who love you the most.
Offence is dangerous and destructive. I have seen people leave churches, lose friends and walk away from destinies because of offence.
The other negative attitude that self-pity invites in is oppression. If you’ve feeling a heaviness or a sadness, that may have come in through a back door. We need to realise what’s at stake and fight back.
If you realise that you’ve fallen prey to self-pity, it’s time to turn away. It’s tempting to feel sorry for ourselves but it will never help. It will hinder our progress in every area of our lives.
In last week’s blog I told you what God said to me when I was swimming in self-pity. He said, “Jo, buck up and believe!” I repented for feeling sorry for myself and chose faith again.
There’s a word that helps
If you realise that you struggle in this area, an attitude of gratitude will help you find your way out. Make a daily habit of saying thank you. Why not list 5 things you’re thankful for every night and 5 things you’re grateful for every morning.
Then ask the Holy Spirit to show you any time you allow old thoughts back in. We are more than conquerors – you can rid yourself of this!
If you want to be completely free of this destructive habit, I encourage you to get my latest book Doorway to your Destiny (US) or here in the UK. It has a chapter dedicated to self-pity. Also, we always deal with this issue at Healed for Life, so please join us.