The Bible teaches that each one of us is unique. God has a tailored plan for your life that reflects your individual design. At the same time, one of the core lessons of Ecclesiastes is that nothing we go through is new:
‘That which has been is what will be, that which is done is what will be done, and there is nothing new under the sun. Is there anything of which it may be said, “See, this is new”? It has already been in ancient times before us.’ (Ecclesiastes 1:9-10)
In the years after my daughter died, I saw myself as a survivor. Someone who had been to hell and back, and made it out alive. I believed that I deserved extra compassion because of the loss I had suffered.
When times were tough, I expected special concessions. When life was good, I saw myself as a hero for being happy. Most of all, I saw myself as different.
When we see ourselves as different, we make allowances for all sorts of things. We accept isolation, allow negative thinking and excuse bad behavior. When we believe our lives are unusual, we can think that we can’t achieve the breakthroughs that others enjoy.
Self-pity can leave us feeling hard done by, disappointed and dejected. It erodes our faith, makes us feel like downing tools and giving up. Left unchecked, self-pity is a destiny destroyer. It causes its victims to be preoccupied with themselves.
I find the final scenes of Elijah’s life sad. After one of the most extraordinary victories on Mount Carmel, defeating the prophets of Baal and proving the power of God, Elijah ran away, terrified of Jezebel.
He escaped to a cave whilst displaying some telltale signs of self-pity. When we feel sorry for ourselves, we often want to retreat and hide somewhere where we can wallow in our circumstances. We believe the lie that our pain is unique or our circumstances are the worst.
Elijah bemoaned the fact that he was the only servant of God alive. Yet the Bible states that there were 7,000 men and women who maintained their faith in the Lord. Believing that he alone was left, Elijah told the Lord that he wanted to die.
Self-pity always seeks to make us give up. It was at this point that God called time on this mighty man of God and raised up Elisha in his place.
History repeats itself. Countless couples across the world have lost their children to untimely death. Indeed, many have lost entire families. Scores of parents have suffered like me and come out strong.
Others have endured battles that are similar to yours and emerged successfully on the other side. Every test or trial has been faced by others down through the centuries (1 Corinthians 10:13).
When we realize that our struggle is not all that different from the battles that others have had to fight, it can help us to put our lives into some sort of perspective. If we take our eyes off our individual issues and instead look to the greatness of God, the Lord can start to work within.
If you want God to do a work within so that you’re ready for your destiny, I encourage you to get my new book, Doorway to your Destiny. It will show you how to accelerate your transformation so that you can fulfil your God given purpose.
It is available here in the UK and here in the US. Also, we have several special events coming up: in this he UK – Healed for Life for Women & Healed for Life for Youth. And in the US, our next Refresher is on 30th September in Pembroke Pines FL. Hope to see you soon!