I became a Christian as a teenager and I had a strong sense that God’s hand was upon me. At sixteen I received a word that I was destined for leadership.
In my twenties, I gave up a promising career for a part-time job that would pay my way through Bible college. Whenever the church doors were open for a meeting, I was there. I was hungry, in love with the Lord and eager to grow.
Soon I started to receive public prophecies about my life and ministry. One time, a close friend walked into church while a pastor was prophesying over someone and she thought, “That must be Jo.” She was right. God was confirming His call on my life.
One week, three different people gave me words that I was special to God and that He had a great purpose for my life. Those words went deep into my heart. The problem was that on the way down, they got twisted.
The prophecies made me feel important and made me think that I was special. Let me explain something crucial. You are very special to God and so am I. But what makes you and I special is not the call of God on our lives. It’s not our gifting or talent. It’s not our ministry or achievements. I am special because I am a daughter of my heavenly Father. You and I are special because we belong to Jesus.
I didn’t know that back then so I started to think that I was more important than other people. That was a problem. When God calls us to ministry, He calls us to lay down our lives for His people. He calls us to be servants. He called me because He values you.
Insecurity and pride
On one hand, I was insecure and fragile, but on the other, I had an inflated view of myself. Insecurity and pride are a particularly unpleasant mix. In fact, insecurity is all too often the root of pride.
But irrespective of the root, if we think more highly of ourselves than we ought, we are on dangerous ground. The Bible gives us a list of things that God hates, that are an abomination to Him. Guess what is right at the top of that list?
“A proud look (the spirit that makes one overestimate himself and underestimate others)…” Proverbs 6:17 (Amplified)
It’s an attitude of heart that can be summed up in one look, one reaction or comment. “Who does she think she is?” “Why on earth would they choose him (rather than me)?”
Jesus, our example
Jesus is a servant king. It hurts Him when we think that we are better than His other children and lord it over fellow believers. Pride is when we look down on other people, when we think that their opinions are less valuable than ours, when we belittle the gifting or experience of brothers or sisters.
Most of my early self-importance was rooted in insecurity. I allowed position to puff me up because in truth I felt like I was nothing. Today, I still battle against pride. Anytime I catch myself feeling entitled or superior, I remind myself that I’m a servant.
I encourage you to go to God in prayer. Ask Him to search your heart. Perhaps pride has crept into your heart too. Maybe it’s a fruit of insecurity. Whatever it is, ask God to help you to humble yourself. I believe 30 Day Detox for your Soul will help you on your way.
If you want to allow God to shine His light into your heart and bring freedom, I encourage you to come to Healed for Life. It’s an amazing two days for anyone who wants to be free from inner hindrances so that you can fulfil your full purpose.
Really need God’s Healing touch for a life of insecurity. Long term off work and memory affected.
Started with my twin sister getting ill. Then lots more.
I’m a christian and clinging onto my faith.
My hubby not a Christian.