Soon after I got married, I arrived back to the office from a meeting one evening to find my husband chatting to our receptionist. I grabbed my bags and then we left.
As we walked to the car, he refereed to her by name, telling me how glad he was to hear that she was getting married. A penny dropped. My husband knew more about the life and well-being of my receptionist than I did. I thought I was the friendly one of us. I was wrong.
A look in the mirror
The following week, Susie, a lady in my team, told me that several account executives had been discussing the management. Apparently (to my relief) they had agreed that I was one of the organisation’s most supportive leaders.
I responded, “I have always felt that I am a gentle manager.” Susie looked surprised to say the least, “Gentle? I don’t think so! Firm, fair, and encouraging, yes, but not gentle!”
I was astounded. I had always believed that I was gentle. This was a bolt out of the blue because my reality proved to be a lie. I wanted to be gentle (as well as firm) so I wasn’t who I thought I was nor who I desired to be.
Over the years, I have learned that others often know us better than we know ourselves. Jeremiah 17:9-10 says: “The heart is deceitful above all things…”
The way I interpret that verse is to say this: our hearts lie to us. Sometimes they lie about our well-being. Other times, our hearts tell us lies about other people.
You may remember the Bible story about the relationship between Saul and David. Saul was Israel’s first king and he was hand-picked by God. Saul hired David because he was a great warrior and a wonderful worshipper.
David was dedicated to serving Saul and his heart was loyal towards his leader. Like I said, Saul employed David because he was gifted and David didn’t disappoint. He led armies to victories and defeated enemies for the king.
The truth can be tough
However, when the people started praising David, Saul could not stand it. The truth was probably that the young warrior’s big wins made Saul feel small. But that’s too painful to admit. So instead, Saul’s heart lied to him and told him that David was after the throne.
“So the women sang as they danced, and said: “Saul has slain his thousands, and David his ten thousands.” Then Saul was very angry, and the saying displeased him; and he said, “They have ascribed to David ten thousands, and to me they have ascribed only thousands. Now what more can he have but the kingdom?” So Saul eyed David from that day forward.”
Saul was suspicious of David’s every move from that day. But David was still dedicated to him and still loyal. Saul’s heart lied to him and he swallowed it, hook, line and sinker. The deceit eventually cost him his destiny. Lies may feel easier in the moment. However, it’s the truth that sets us free.
The way to freedom
The more we allow God to deal with the issues of our hearts, the more we can be free to fulfil our purpose. How hard do you find facing the truth? Although it can be tough at first. It gets easier the more we do it.
If you want to be free from inner issues, I encourage you to come to Healed for Life. God will put a mirror in front of your heart, show you what has been holding you back and bring great freedom.